Waiting for Words

Waiting for Words ©

By Michael Casey

Well I’m waiting in for the parcel man to collect something the wife mis-ordered, she’s small so when she orders stuff it looks perfect on the model but on her, on 5feet 1inch her, it’s too big. So I have a relationship with the courier guy who comes to take it back again.

As for writing you have to wait for the words to come, or the idea to come, then the words will take care of themselves, that’s how it is with me. If I’m too tired I cannot write to order, I’m no journalist, I’m more of a wilting flower, overlooked at today’s Chelsea flower show.

I just need a spark and the explosion I can provide myself, I eat far too many beans and eggs no doubt, I even eat scrambled egg with beans it, no need for central heating in our house. So I wait for a title and away I go. I was waiting for the parcel man, I still am, I have to get to Aldi before the girls get home from school. Anyway the word Waiting arrives in my mind, so that’s the spark and the parcel man is here, so wait please.

It’s one week later now, no the forms are not in triplicate, I just got tired and the half term arrived, if you have school age kids of your own you will understand. Hang on its Totoro our cat miaowing in the background, she got out the other day and came back very tired, the joys of free love for a cat who cannot have kittens, now she wants out again, sleeping under beds is not as good as having Tom from next door.

So back to waiting for words, it’s not as bad as waiting for Godot, which we all suffered at school 40 years ago, no, the right words just have to be chosen. I never use a Thesaurus even if Roger is very kind to sit on my bookshelf to my right in his yellow jacket, such a fashion conscience person, my sister gave me an old copy of hers. I see it this way if I cannot use a good selection of words to tell a story at my age, then I should just give up the ghost. I did listen to BBC Radio4 for 20 years before starting to write 30 years ago.

So that’s why I write the way I write, I’m a story teller just like Jeffrey Archer, though he is £300,000,000 richer than me, I have zero and he has all the money in the world. Though I do know he is a nice man, prison education stuff and so forth. I did contact him once, I had hoped he’d send me a photo copy of his Monet in a cheap frame, better still he’d get confused and send me the real thing, though he’d probably just send me a bottle of diet Coke with a photo of his Monet attached. Hope he is smiling, I know people  have belittled his writing, but he had balls and look at him now.

So words are important, they help tell the tale, me and my small daughter joke that alliteration is used by writers who cannot write. Her English teacher adores her, but she is just writing to order in the style they expect, horror and mystery just drips from her pen. As my wife is a horror movie fan I suppose it’s inevitable that it’s in the genes. I do tell her that style is the most important thing, I just cannot read anything that is badly written or in a style I hate. Advertising speak is the worst form of words possible, some people think that writing like that is prose, it’s just junk. I once had an American radio station say they loved my style but not the content, maybe sending a piece to a Hip Hop radio station was not the right target audience.

So do I choose words for my audience? I just tell the tale and hope they enjoy it, to make them smile during  a busy day at work. Or while they sit on 3^rd and 7^th diner they have a look at my latest story and smile, who is this Limey anyway, that’s why I attach a photo to most things I write, so they know who I am. Maybe I should just attach a photo of a male model, instead of a mature security guard like image of me, the real thing, or just a picture of a diet Coke, with a Monet in the background.

Words can fail you in some situations, you get tongue tied or just cannot believe what is being said, but on paper, this is my ice rink, I can glide and slide and even pirouette and jump high and land perfectly, just like in The Bishop’s Wife with Cary Grant and David Niven all those years ago. And no I don’t waste my time rewriting and polishing, I know Jeffrey Archer can rewrite 13 times or so, for me that would be torture like waiting for trail and execution. I’m talking to you and my fingers put my words on the page for you. Life is only one chance, don’t waste time on polish, go out and eat Polish bread and meat from your local Deli, enjoy it washed down with Stella Artois, don’t wait for words, just make love to life.