Blind Man's Buff

Blind Man’s Buff ©

By 

Michael Casey

I was wondering what to talk about and now the house is quiet while my 3 witches have gone AWOL, I still hadn’t an idea, so I had a look to see who in the World was reading me. It’s the World Barak, the Planet was a newspaper in Superman, or is one of us getting confused?  So I checked out my readers and noticed Italy was taking a peek, so the Pope must be hiding in his study having a laugh at my words. Germany is also looking a lot lately, so much so that I posted

 The Butcher The Baker and The Undertaker in German translation on https://www.michaelgcaseyfrombirminghamengland.wordpress.com  site

maybe his shoe loving predecessor is looking at me to, from Germany.  

 Well I have to amuse myself someway, the days of popping out to the Theatre to watch a play are beyond me, so I write instead. Whereas Shakespeare killed two birds with one stone, he wrote them and staged them and may have even acted in them. The closest I get to Shakespeare is the pub on the high street.

Barry White has just told me to give you all my undivided attention, so I’ll get to the plot, or am I too much like Dave Allen, in that I meander? Well do you all remember Blind Man’s Buff? We all played it as kids, it cost nothing, you can your old snotty handkerchief as a blindfold. It wasn’t invented by a mixed up torturer either, blindfold the victim and then sneak about hitting him. Though I hope none of my readers are bad boys and use the idea. 

If any of you are torturers then remember this, a wet lettuce in the hands of an expert is a very dangerous thing, so I will seek you out and you will feel my wet lettuce. So I hope that puts the fear of God into you, failing that google Larry Grayson the camp British comedian, then be very afraid that he goes not come and get you. He has a Black Belt 7^th Dan in knitting and crochet, and  what he did to his Postman Pop it in Pete would make your eyes water. Ok, no Torture.

Now where was I, can I borrow your chair Larry, and can you get my pills, Isla St. Clair may have them in your sewing basket. All this talk of torture has but me off my stride. Now, this chair in uncomfortable I need to plump my cushions, ah, that’s better, a good plump is always good. The trouble is Lech, Boris and Gregorgi have turned up and they think everything I say is a metaphor or is it meteor? I told them there is a sack of potatoes in the garden so they’ll go off and make Poteen in the garden shed. 

Now I’ll talk about blind man’s buff. It’s a fun game and we can all enjoy it, innocent fun on a summers day. Walking around on tiptoe so as not to be heard, and not to be caught out. Lots of laughter and arguments and fighting, and storming off, rather like Politics or Theatre. You have to listen hard if you are blindfolded to try and catch your prey. If you are not blindfolded you whisper or use sign language so as not to be caught. You  even hold out the yard brush or the mop so the blind man catches that instead of you. Or in our family you swish the dog’s tail against your sisters bare knee to make her jump. Or even hold out the cat for her to touch and catch and get scratched. Normal family fun.

Being blind is not fun though, you have to adapt. If you are lucky you get a dog to be your eyes, I saw  a lady training a black Labrador today and if I’m lucky enough to get a dog soon, no I’m not blind,  I’d get a black dog. Maybe I should call the dog Churchill. Churchill called his melancholy, his depression Black Dog, so you don’t need to read Boris Jonson’s book now as I’ve removed the blindfold.

A blindfold can be a good thing, it protects you from seeing too much when you are a journalist visiting terrorists for that scoop. But normally a journalists is there to remove the blindfolds of ignorance. A journalist is the little boy that says the King isn’t wearing new clothes, he is in fact naked. That’s why free press is so important. We had an item on Beyond 100 Days on the BBC, it showed scores if not 100s of small tv stations mouthing the same script. Sadly in USA there is too much of this. It is bad of Democracy.

The only way to know what really is happening is by having a look at several different media outlets and not just those from your own point of view. Perhaps if the newsreaders were naked then some might watch and then broaden their opinions. Stormy Daniels and 17 others reading the news perhaps? Radio 4 on the BBC is the best news coverage in my experience of 50 years of being a news junkie, and remember you can take a radio to bed or in the shower with you. But do remember one thing, to blindfold the radio or use plastics,  otherwise  your radio will steam up in the bathroom, while you wash your ignorance away. Pass the soap Stormy.