I'm going to go in the garden to heat up, sat here in the window in the shade its 10 degrees cooler
Enjoy the old piece
And thank you Crazy Rich Asians in Singapore for returning, are you going to try and overtake USA
Then Singapore will be my greatest readers EVERYWHERE
this site is your final conquest
or is it me?
Its what's inside that matters NOT the packaging, Trump never understood that.
Short stories from Birmingham readers in 162 countries so far HEAR ME READ ALOUD 207 stories written & read by me https://profile.typepad.com/michaelgcasey https://michaelgcasey.typepad.com/blog/
Today we had the Ivanka Trump vacuum-cleaning Art event in Washington DC, her over protective and maybe even pompous brothers defended her. I did actually work, and work very hard at the Crowne Plaza Birmingham NEC for 3 years, 2002 to2005. When I met my own wife she had a vacuum in her hand, I’ve even helped vacuum hotel corridors amongst the 10 or roles I did at the hotel.
Try mattress tossing for yourself as well. So I know the value of physical work, though now with arthritis and post quadruple heart bypass I’d probably die if I tried. I’m only fit to be a gigalo well in my imagination, if I can bait enough of you politically correct readers. Though the PC Brigade would never read any of my stuff, besides to Smile is a Sin.Smiling is so very uncool.
The Washer Woman was of course the lowest person of the social strata, she took in washing because she was so poor. In the old days washing was placed on hedges to dry. Then washing lines were invented, and the windmill was pressed into service to dry clothes, hanging codpieces and all that on the sails to dry. As the sails spun wheat was ground to produce flower, Windy Miller so to speak. He would feed people while his wife cleaned their knickers and knew all their dirty secrets judged by the state of their dirty washing.
If you’ve seen the 1974 Three Musketeers I am sure you can picture everything in your mind’s eye. It is I escaping the Lady’s bedchamber through a window, just like Patrick in an early scene from The Butcher The Baker and The Undertaker. Now washer women or cleaners know everything, because the see everything and tidy up the mess. I know this too because it was me always working the late shifts, the horrible shifts, so I always met and talked to the cleaners.
People, certain people talk down to cleaners or just ignore them. When my sister was training to be a teacher 30 years ago she had a Summer job as a cleaner, doing a deep clean at the Hospital. This is where the ward is emptied and everything is cleaned to an inch of its life, good job they are in a hospital. Now as a cleaner she was treated one way when she bumped into people in the canteen. So when she let it slip that actually she was training to be a teacher then she was treated differently by doctors and whoever she bumped into in the hospital.
The obvious question is why wasn’t she just treated the same all the time? In my concierge days I probably met and talked to 100,000 people over those 3 years, so I’d pitch myself, my style of talking to who I was talking to. A millionaire performer one minute, a blind lady with a dog the next. Then one of the chefs round the back of the hotel, or Vicky one of the cleaning crew next. I hope I treat everybody equally, I don’t put myself on any pedestal, only stupid people do that, as you become a target. It’s wiser to hide your light under a bushel at first until people get to know you.
That’s why people with a sense of humour are always more fun. If all a person can talk about is their Wealth, then that’s sad, or even tragic. We’veall seen Citizen Kane where on his Deathbed the billionaire says Rosebud which was his childhood sledge. Will Trump say, I built a Wall, if he gets his way finally. Isn’t far better to be remembered with Love?
He was a fat silver haired writer in shades from Birmingham England, of no use whatsoever with his body hampered with arthritis and a dodgy heart, even though he did have beautiful soft hair, full of dandruff. A deluded fat so and so, who thought he could be a gigalo, was he joking or hoping? But, and here’s the thing for you American readers, he made me laugh, he made over 40 countries laugh.
Now that perhaps is my legacy, though I can dress up in drag just Freddie Mercury did and stand next to that Ivanka Trump lookalike and sweep that carpet in Washington DC. Though I’d prefer not to vacuum for crumbs, how about dollar bills. And Ivanka if Barron sends you this to read, why not sneak down and join in the vacuum-cleaning fun, 2 hour workout is perfect. Go I double dare you, and if you are in UK I’ll buy you fish and chips, what an offer, I may even throw in a kebab.
I’ve just been looking at the newspapers on the Internet this Sunday morning, and it makes for some very sober reading. Apart from Pippa’s wedding, they all had a great time, so good luck to them all. However parallels from History scream out. Harry is dating a divorcee while North Korea is playing with its toys, and Russia is quietly and not so quietly stirring the pot and punching above its weight. Trump has signed a 110,000,000,000 dollar arms deal. A casual remembrance of History will remind you of WWI and WWII.
People are starving and we, as in us Humans are playing with toys that could destroy or pollute the world. So it reminds me of a piece I wrote recently called Redemption, where aliens minding their own business decide to intervene to save us. The line from that story is, and how did you know Jesus, dad. I helped him carry his cross to Calvary the alien replied to his son. I also wrote a piece in July 2009 called Nobel and Me. Nobel as you know read his own obituary, and then changed, Nobel by the way invented dynamite.
Back in 2009 I was leaving Pinsent Masons, and indirectly it gave me time for writing, though all I wanted at the time was a new job. Arthritis and Unplanned Quadruple Heart bypass, as well as CkD, kidney problems were not even thought of.
So with this in mind I was thinking how would the powers that be fare as they had their Exit Interview, exit from this life into the next.
So what did you do in Life? I was a Politician. Next. Give me a chance to speak. You had enough time already. Give him a job cleaning the chewing gum off the pavements. I don’t like the look of him, make that 10,000 years of chewing gum cleaning. But that’s not fair. Are you going to argue with Me?
And what did you do in Life? Silence. You refuse to confess? SCREAMING. I WAS THE LEADER. On your knees, on your belly like a worm. Now whisper to me, just exactly what did you do in Life. I was a leader. No, you were a Butcher, while the people lacked a Baker, and you led them to the Undertaker. I was a leader hissed the Snake. This one is for you Saint Patrick, get him out of my sight. A zillion years at least crawling like a worm in the dirt.
And what did you do in Life? I did nothing, I was afraid to do anything, I hoped it would all go away if I did nothing. I was the head of the UN. Reincarnation for you. But I thought this was the Final Judgement? God loved that film Groundhog Day, so UN, you get a zillion chances to see if you can finally get it right. And a zillion more chances until you do.
And what did you do in Life? I was a thief, a liar and a fraud, I stole and I cheated on my wife and my girlfriend simultaneously. I had a heart attack while cheating with my lover. Are you Casanova? No I just wished I was. Why should you be allowed in? I should not. I deserve nothing but pain, and Hell’s fire. Casanova was hugged and embraced like a long lost brother, like the Prodigal Son himself. There is more rejoicing in Heaven for a repentant sinner than for many many good men after all.
And what of you? I destroyed the world in fire storm of Nuclear War. I had to, my country was under attack, so I had to. My beautiful Earth, my Eden floating in space destroyed by you. What is your name? What is your name? We are many, we are ignorance, we are war, we are Leaders without a soul. We are arrogant, we do not care, we kiss babies that are our bastards, we are Leaders of a planet dying and burning in the wreckage of Nuclear war.
God has they last Word , just as he had the first. This is a dream, a warning to you all. Love God Love him a Lot, and never hide behind the fences of faith and ignorance. This really is your last chance. Time has been rewound so you get a chance to save my Eden, I created Time so I can rewind it, use it well, don’t Love Money so much that Evil is allowed to flourish, burn down bridges that promote Money not Love.
Michael Casey what are you doing hiding there? I was afraid, I did not know what to say in answer to your question. And what did you do in Life? And what did you do Michael? I broke my parents heart while they were alive. And now its too late. Look can you see though the clouds. Hold my hand Michael, can you see your mother pouring the for everybody. And your dad too.
They were so proud and still are, my son is a storyteller just as I told him stories when I was alive, can you hear your dad boasting to everybody.
I can hear my dad, but I’m so weak now, all buggered up as my dad might say, with arthritis pain and surgery pain and so on. Yes, but from this well of weakness stories surge and pour out onto the page. Yes, but nobody knows me. Do you want fame? No, just a nice house and something to leave for my daughters. I could do with less pain though, but I’ll accept the pain for a long life.
Are you haggling with God, the Almighty? No but my friend Padre Pio said always ask for the Big Grace. And its because of him I have a family in the first place, its in Padre Pio and Me. I am the Almighty I KNOW EVERYTHING ALREADY. Sorry, I just feel so helpless sometimes. But you keep your sense of humour.
Well yes, eventually I might make some money for my daughters’ future. I am nothing, my Future is dust.
That’s what they said about Jesus as he hung on the cross…
I've updated this 15th Sept 2024 I'm Michael Casey from Birmingham England, the fat silver haired writer in shades. Beware of Others with the EXACT SAME NAME, they are not me, and would not want to be me ... use Google UK to find me, otherwise Posh Americans pop up I've done loads of writing, about 3,000,000 Words worth over 36years now But before I started to write, I LISTENED to BBC Radio 4 for 20 years, from the age of 10 or younger Frank Brown our lodger, went back to County Tyrone and he gifted us his Bush Radio. He'd be nearly 102 now if he is still alive, so say a prayer for him 56 years in love with words, and I still look so dashing. I have a picture in the attic, just like Dorian Gray I've also had an interest in Politics for 56 years with my dad heckling the tv and Politicians. I almost immediately had a hit, a play called Shoplife was accepted but not finally produced by a Theatre. The Kenneth More Theatre, so thank them for sparing you all. This was back in 1989 yes, 35 years ago, the play was written in 1988. So since then I'm more than good enough, as a writer. Anything else..... I also ignore those who just cannot write, pick your own candidate I tend to write Comedy as I'd rather make you laugh than cry I have written over 2000 short pieces of writing, yes 2000 " (c) by Michael Casey" If you include "chats" 5000 samples, all told, the chats do NOT go into my books when I compile them. My first book ,a full length comedy/drama is The Butcher The Baker and The Undertaker You can read translations of it here on this site Up to 20 different languages/translations have been read on the same day via this site, here on Wordpress look fo Translations Galore page, and more And in over 167 Countries world wide too so you have no excuse, find your own language and read The Butcher The Baker and The Undertaker or Quick Stories or any other of the books in Translation on my Wordpress This proves to me that the humour does travel I have readers in over 167 countries now, just to repeat myself From Nepal to American Samoa and all places North South East and West Or its just a hit man on the run, or whatever Unknown Region Means It may also mean that only non English Speakers like my stuff Coverage but lacking penetration as marketing folks might say I did get 21,000 readers in 3 weeks for the Polish version of In Search of an Indian Princess. which is basically the final 3 chapters of The Butcher The Baker and The Undertaker all by word of mouth. And 50,000 plus in Christmas week 2021 If you add up all the downloads from my Wordpress + 13,000 when somebody stole the file. I have had more copies than Boris Johnson's Churchill book distributed. Maybe 40,000 copies . Not made a penny from it, free downloads in multiple languages. Reverse Logic, if the world knows me, eventually somebody will pay me But in reality I'll be dead first, and then just 2 pennies to pay the ferryman is enough I've cut the Plaudits, you can read/decide for yourself As for my life, I was born in the shadow of a Brewery, I was a computer operator for a market research company into alcohol sales, 21 years altogether, StatsMR Call centre guy, like everybody once in their life I was also a Trainee Betting Shop Manager I was a concierge and 10 other roles at Crowne Plaza NEC Birmingham for 3 years. Spent 3 years at Pinsent Masons Law firm in Birmingham I even hid a copy of my comic novel "BBU" in the Law Library at Pinsent Masons, well just for a day.. I did a few other jobs too, working life in reverse so to speak and I was an Esol English teacher in an Islamic school, for a year, I knew I could teach. I got Excellent, Excellent and Exemplary on the external assessment, yes really And I asked them to pray for me at least once a day beside which I've had a Shanghai connection for 20+ years now, including 2 bilingual daughters and being a hausfrau a long time too, I'm a great dad, as I've had lots of time with my daughters I can always make somebody talk or laugh I believe my short stories could be used to teach English, just package them up correctly or App them Or a Tale a Day from Michael, a story telling App What else, I was brawn and brains, I used to be as strong as an Ox, now I just smell like one We have a cat called Totoro, my daughters wanted a pet I said they could have a dog if I died , or a cat if I had a heart attack. A few weeks after that in Jan 2015 I had an Unplanned Quadruple Heart Bypass , it was supposed to be a triple but it ended up a Quadruple, 33% extra free so to speak. Now with an add on Hernia, the size of your fist, pushing through my bypass scar, it hurts when I laugh, so don't make me laugh I also have arthritis and other hindrances that hobble my body and give me pain galore. But my mind is free, though having read my stories you may wish I didn't bother But I'll ignore you, and carry on regardless. I do get heckled by my own Tinnitus these past 5 years+, so I have music on all night long to drown it out. I sleep with Miley, Taylor, Eric Clapton and Will Young, maybe I should buy a bigger bed, or just get a better mattress. Tinnitus is a curse, just trust me I know, each day I wake up, Tinnitus SCREAMS at me for a full hour till it calms down or not at all, a merry go around of noise That's the end of the tidy version of my life To finish here's the list of my 20 books, so far:- 1.The Butcher The Baker and The Undertaker 2.Shoplife 3.Essays and Plays 4.Blogs 2011 5.300 and Not OUT 6.Shorts 2013 7.More Shorts 2014 8.Quick Stories 9.Still Alive 2015 10.Undiscovered Words 2016 11.Still Smiling 2017 12.Altogether Now 13.New Horizons 14.14 Up 15.15 Down 16.Sweet Sixteen 17. 17 Again 18. 18 New Views 19. The Final Cut of the 19th Hole 20. 2020 Words 21. Fresh Fields, i decided was a better title, when the USA election is over I'll launch it 96,000 words so far I write bullet point stuff mainly now as Tinnitus stops me from getting in the zone to write, story stories. (c) by Michael Casey stuff though my bullet points are better than some "writers" discuss, miaow. That's why I dream of a speed typist, so I could dictate from the sofa https://www.amazon.co.uk/Michael-Casey/e/B00571G0YC to buy ebooks Loads of Korean and Arabic translations downloaded from my Wordpress, 1000s of them Quick Stories in Korean is a big hit. Maybe Kim in North Korea should read my books, instead of wasting his countries resources on what? Just keeping one person in power, him? Instead of joining the real world and opening a string on golf courses. That way we could get rid of Trump too. Into the sunset, as they play golf. Tears for a Butcher will be the sequel to BBU, and it too will be 600pages, however I really need a speed typist to put it down, while I sit and dictate like Barbara Cartland, and hopefully my speed typist would be impressed. we'd marry have half Korean kids, and form a Kpop band with our 4 new kids, with me as manager. my 2 daughters are at University now, so if you finally pay me, I can pass it on to them And yes this is more for my bucket list, as Tinnitus keeps me awake too much, 6 months of not sleeping till dawn is really killing me, it is the worse thing in my life ever, and I've had far to many horrible things. That's why I go the other direction and write comedy Michael Casey aka the fat silver haired writer in shades from Birmingham England https://2.gravatar.com/avatar/efda2dca0de5b9269191b7c8b0102473?s=400&d=mm View all posts by michaelgcasey
Saturday 28th Jan 2023 not so much left shoulder pain today did have had a migraine for a bit but most of all today NOISE in my right ear to...
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