From Tramp to Male Model

From Tramp to Male Model ©

By

Michael Casey

As you know I had a haircut, so now I look like a male model, I am available for bookings, so long as I can keep all the clothes. I am 5 feet 10 inches with a 46 inch chest, with a 29 inch leg. And I’m 114kilos or there abouts. I look 20 kilos lighter, as its tight fat not loose fat. Oh and I like Rayban Wayfarer sunglasses. So that’s my advert, and before I forget I like Polo stuff too. Not that I’ve bought any clothes lately, you may have noticed from the photos I attach to my writing.

So why do we attach so much to appearances? A man will be lazy and not shave so he looks like a tramp, or maybe an A lister film star, you decide for yourself. A haircut or lack of one can change your own self perception, or certainly how others see you. If you just brush your hair it does make a difference, as does brushing your eyebrows into order and facing the same direction. Dan Dan the disparate man, combed his hair with the leg of a chair and washed his face in a frying pan. Yes really it was Michael Casey, the nursery rhyme was changed, and it did not mention my trail of dandruff across the carpet.

So a bit of spit and polish does make a difference, spit can be used to tame those wild eyebrows. Though I did cut my eyebrows off, I was 4 years old and I found the scissors. Maybe that’s why they are the way they are today. Though when I was 13 I plucked my eyebrows off while I was acing backwards and forwards learning French for a test. I went to school the next day with painted on eyebrows thanks to my sister’s skills with a mascara brush. The lads never noticed, whoever on the 2^nd day with my painted on eyebrows they did. Anybody else would have been mocked, but as I was the largest lad in the year nobody dared. I said a Chemistry set had blown up in my face, and that was the end of it. In fact I had been given a Chemistry recently.

So as you can see my appearance has always been of great importance too me, and the photos bear this out. As I grew up I swapped my school uniform for another uniform, jeans and a shirt and tie. I looked like a member of Status Quo, I did listen to Caroline loads of times as I studied for my school exams. So that was my evolution.

Then when I ended up in a Hotel CPNEC Birmingham I had to wear a suit and shave for 3 years, or my approximation. My waist is large as is my derriere, just as Donald Trump’s is, that’s why he wears baggy clothes. So for 3 years I had to wear a suit and a rubbish tie, which means that nowadays I almost never wear a tie. Because of my age and silver hair a lot of people thought I was the Manager, I was 20 years older than the Front of House crew. It’s all down to the bearing and the booming voice. I should also add a Big Thank You, to Jonathan Walker my first General Manager. I wonder did he become a writer too, or open a distillery?

Clothes Maketh the Man they say and it’s true, because people react to you differently. Having a shave and a slash of deodorant does make a difference too. Unshaved I look like Lee Marvin in Paint Your Wagon, no doubt it’s on Utube. But shaved I get Sir, instead of mate or being ignored. So try it and see for yourselves. Obviously when I’m in drag every 2^nd Saturday night I get looks, lots of them due to my hairy legs and short short skirts exposing my scars, don’t be jealous Lech, Boris and Gregorgi.

I need to finish now as my friend Arthur my arthritis has been playing up while I’m talking to you. However I hope you get the picture, clothes do make a difference as does grooming. The irony is that we all dress up so well and try to look our best and why? So that we persuade the one we love to get undressed, slowly or quickly whatever way pleases us both. I am right am I? Maybe I should write about how to undress seductively, I was a female stripper once…