Thursday, 1 February 2018

Impressions and Reality

Impressions and Reality ©
By
Michael Casey

I’m chilling today, I didn’t feel too hot yesterday, so I’m just chilling. Sadly I’ve reached a point in my life where I do have to “face facts” and as I use that phrase Jon the Hippy comes to mind, as he was the guy that used it maybe 25 years ago. Jon was eternally relaxed, he has a great back story too, which I won’t share. That’s the point though, we can have an impression of somebody and then there is the reality, I will always thank Jon as he taught me how to appreciate alcohol. Even though I drink very seldom, I do enjoy it, thanks to him, he also taught me how to ride a bicycle. Though I nearly did go into the stream in Selly Oak.

Facing facts today means due to the proper Winter we are having in England this Jan/Feb 2018, I need to be very careful. Why? Because when the cold air hits your lungs no matter how well you are wrapped up it really is dangerous. You all know about the medical problems I have, I hate the poncy word “issues”, when you have to stop dead in the street because of the cold, that is a problem not an issue. So I have to face facts, I’m no longer a young and very virile man, ok I was exaggerating, I’m just not George Clooney anymore. Outwardly I am, but underneath the bonnet, and no I don’t wear old women’s hats, just the stockings and suspenders, they really keep you warm you know. Ask your granny if you don’t believe me. Stop a Babuska in Kiev and ask her.

Enough of my weaknesses, Reality and Impressions can be so very far apart. You may think that that man is very effeminate, only to discover he has 7 daughters, so your perception is one thing, but the reality is another. Or a worker in a care home is so kind only to discover they are battering your old grandad. The truth, the reality only comes out when a hidden camera is installed. Having just written that I remember that one of the stories in Tears for a Butcher will revolve around a care home.I’ve written a few pages of it already. It will be very sad but very very funny. I won’t spoil it by explaining my ideas now. But you have to remember my dad was in a care home, a very good one for 5.5 years so I know a lot about the subject.

So now that we accept there are major differences between impressions and reality what should we do about it? Well fact check, Alec Baldwin is not Donald Trump. Which one is funnier and which one makes you laugh the most and which makes you cry the most? You need to take time to find the facts. Actions always DO speak louder than words, in the Bible one son says he will work in the fields but does not, and the other actually does. You may have a co-worker who is the laziest man in the world, I have met a few in my working life. To the manager he is so so good, but the reality is he hides and does no work. I could name names at this point but I won’t. We all have experienced this I’d wager.

Products that we make in our factories, when we do work while the lazy one hides have to quality tested. They have to be fit for purpose, if you take the kettle out of the box and the spout falls off the company will soon be out of business. Quality control matters as does the original design. So we should take time in our decisions about what we be buy. You may want A, but you look at A to Z before you decide, even if you do buy A, your original first preference. I can remember the fun and games we had when my wife got her first car, a Skoda Fabia by the way.

All of which brings me to people and relationships of any kind. Yes have your first impression, he is the fat silver haired writer in shades from Birmingham, the one in England. And I hate the SOB, or I love the SOB, or whatever you feel about me. I could talk about Lech, Boris and Gregorgi but they still have the shovels they used in Davos for the snow, so I could end up buried alive in the woods up the road.

So I talk about myself and then you the reader or listeners have to transpose it to your friends around you, that way I don’t end buried in the woods with dogs peeing all over me for a week. Until Lech, Boris and Gregorgi have a week’s worth of webcam footage, and only then do they release me.

Now I hope the Trio of cousins are laughing,or I really really am in trouble and I may as well lay down and let the dogs pee on me. The point is we all have 1st impressions, but Life and Love and Cooking makes us change our minds. We did not like the girl, until she cooked for us, and that was it, you were married in weeks. My own wife cooked for me, I ended up going to the shop 3 times before I had all the ingredients. Or you hated him , he was an ogre, he wouldn’t know what a bar of soap was even if you threw one at him. But when your dad was sick he walked 2 miles through the snow to get his medicine. So you just had to marry him, but you did wash him thoroughly and every night you pretend to be Japanese as you washed your man in the tin bath in front of the fire. It did not matter you were in Chicago, love is love is love.

I’ve give you all a few impressions of reality, some cartoons made with words, if you you want to reenact them, then that is up to you. I seem to remember in Sex and The City Samantha lay down naked with Japanese food all over her body. You could all do that and then move on the bathing in the bath. Meryl Street and Clint Eastwood shared a bath long ago, in a film. So why not be your own film stars, but fish and chips and a sausage spread over a naked body could be dangerous. Though you could use your belly button to hold the sauce.











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