Let me be
your Leader ©
By Michael
Casey
Lots of
Leadership needed everywhere at the moment so here’s a few tips for all
candidates. They can rehearse in front of a mirror.
I Want to serve, to be a humble
servant, I have studied the Ides of March, some say too thoroughly. I have much
experience of handling dough, my grandfather was a Baker, Hilda Baker was his
drag act at the weekends, but otherwise he was all man, as his many mistresses
can testify, I suppose that’s where I got it from, the dough not the
mistresses, I am an honourable man, well I have not been found out yet.
Policies, what policies? I’ll have a
read of the gutter press and the high and mighty and maybe a bit of the BBC or
even Fox. Give me a few ideas about what the people, my people, our people, the
stupid people, yes I love them too not just that man with the blonde hair, the
American guy, Hunt, or something rhyming with Stunt, stupid people must be
listened to, they vote more than most. Rich people are in the South of France so
why chase them if they don’t bother to vote.
So I’ll rehearse my speech not like
my competitor, who just cannot talk, he may have been a prefect in his grammar
school, but really he is worse than the illiterate drunk we see at my political
meetings, he only comes for the sandwiches and 7 teas.
So I’ll go around and tell my lies
and hope my lies are fatter than the other person’s lies, so long as I can act
just like that old Leader, the very successful one, whose name I cannot
remember, but he was so good, whatever his name was.
Then we’ll have the ballot, and of
course I’ll win, and if I don’t I’ll leave politics and become a political
commentator and do the chat so circuit, it pays twice what I’d get in politics,
just make sure never to tell the truth in the green room when I’m ½ pissed. So
All in All or is it Measure for Alcoholic Measure, I’ll win or just be richer
as a political hack. It’s all a load of
Ballots anyway.
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